Day 6: My little bit of happy - My pictures of Caleb, complements of my dear friend at http://amazinglygracefulphotography.blogspot.com/
It really really is. I'm finding myself treading water these days. I wonder how long it will take before I regroup and know where I am and where I am going.
A week ago I was an expectant mother, enjoying the early movements of her tiny new baby. Looking forward to the joys and discomforts of pregnancy. Anticipating child birth. Planning to have a newborn nursling. Dreaming of cloth diapers and soft silky skin.
Today my womb is empty and my son's cold dead body is laying in the ground 2 miles away from me.
I want to be pregnant.
More specifically I want to be 18 weeks and 3 days pregnant.
I want my son. I want Caleb. I want to hold him and touch him. I want him squirming and kicking inside of me.
This is so different from my miscarriages. That I know how to do. This, not so much.
About Me
- mothergoose518
- Somewhat Crunchy, Old Fashioned, Fundamental Bible Believing Christian.
Full time stay at home mom to many.
(Two by choice, Six by birth, Eight in Heaven)
Infertility, miscarriage, and stillbirth survivor.
College student. Relaxed homeschooler. Molder of hearts and minds. Cheerer of ball games.
Lover of books. Stringer of words. Wanna be photographer.
Passionate lover and helper of my Super Hubbie!
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